I have nothing interesting to say right now, I actually feel rather blah...the details of my car purchase are slowly working themselves out. I fucked up and put two different address on my finance app. Apparently this through the finance company into a hissy fit. The business manager from the dealership called asking which was my real address. Its gotten complicated, b/c the insurance company thinks I live in western MD with my folks (heyyyy...its alot cheaper to live there) so for simplicity I told him that I do live in balmer but am moving home and got confused. He said that I'd prob'ly be getting a call from the financers and just to tell them the same thing and I should be fine. I don't really like the word 'should' where my credit record is concerned...

This weekend is BeachWeekend 2001! Every year I weasel my way into the schedule for the family beach house and take a bunch o' friends along with me. Usually 15 or so head downy oshun and act stupid for a few days. There are drinking games, massive amounts of food, and random hookups - what more could you ask for. Since I have nothing spectacular to say today, I'll include the final email I sent reminding everyone about the weekend. I've sent 2 prior emails, one a set of FAQs about the weekend, the other a fake news story about it, this is the final installment.

******************************

Los Alamos National Laboratory (AP) -

Scientists at the nation's largest and most advanced research facility revealed a new breakthrough today, showcasing technology that will literally rewrite the pages of history.

"This is truly amazing," commented lead scientist Dr. Emmitt Brown "the ability to discern the true meaning of historical documents has long been sought. Now it is finally within our grasp."

The technology developed by Dr Brown's team, HistoriScan2001, was only realized after a 10 year, 25 billion dollar investment. Using the latest quantum-resolution laser scanners and complex and highly classified supercomputing processors, historical documents like Plato's works, the Magna Carta and the U.S. Constitution are analyzed and translated into information more pertinent to the modern reader. Not technically a translation, the HistoriScan2001 applies what was written to what was known about the personality of the author to provide what would have been produced had the document been originated in the current time frame.

Although full plans for the new technology have not been released, officials at Los Alomos did release the results of their final 'test run' so that the public could judge the effectiveness of HistoriScan2001. The document sampled was Lincoln's Gettysburg Address. The results are below:

*******************************************

'Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth, upon this continent, a new nation, conceived in liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that "all men are created equal"'

***3 years ago Mike founded, in Bethany Beach,a chance to party, conceived in drunkeness, and dedicated to the proposition that "we should totally go to the beach...and just...umm....drink alot."***

"Now we are engaged in a great civil war, testing whether that nation, or any nation so conceived, and so dedicated, can long endure. We are met on a great battle field of that war. We come to dedicate a portion of it, as a final resting place for those who died here, that the nation might live. This we may, in all propriety do. But, in a larger sense, we can not dedicate -- we can not consecrate -- we can not hallow, this ground -- The brave men, living and dead, who struggled here, have hallowed it, far above our poor power to add or detract. The world will little note, nor long remember what we say here; while it can never forget what they did here."

***Time has passed, friends have moved on. The scarcity of free time tests whether Beach Weekend or any weekend so conceived and dedicated can long endure. We attempt to meet once more in the hallowed house in which previous weekends of decandence and debauchery have occurred. With enough liquor we will little note nor long remember what we say this weekend - but we will always remember the good times had there. (ok, maybe not *fully* remember, but hazy memories are better than none at all.)***

"It is rather for us, the living, we here be dedicated to the great task remaining before us -- that, from these honored dead we take increased devotion to that cause for which they here, gave the last full measure of devotion -- that we here highly resolve these dead shall not have died in vain; that the nation, shall have a new birth of freedom, and that government of the people by the people for the people, shall not perish from the earth."

***It is for us, those still dedicated to good friends-good food-good booze, to increase our devotion to acting significantly less mature than we appear at our day jobs. To give the last full measure of our collective adolescence - to resolve that those who cannot attend do not go sober in vain; that the nation shall have a new birth of silliness, and that a community of the liquor, by the liquor, for the liquor, shall not perish from the earth.***

Revisionist historians have long debated whether Lincoln attached greater meaning to the Gettysburg Address than is publically accepted. Now there seems to be an answer. "I think its great." says Cornell History Chair Bob Sacamano. "Who knew - if old Abe >were alive today he'd be 'downy oshun' with that Mike kid and the rest of the gang; and the first keg would be on him!"

***************************

Get fired up people - Beach Weekend 2001 is THIS WEEKEND!

The Address: **blah blah protecting my anonimity blah blah** (on the intersection), Bethany Beach Delaware

The Phone Number: 123-456-7890 or Mike's cell:987-654-3210

When: I'll be there from Thursday night through Sunday afternoon - come any time

What to bring: sleeping bag, clothes, money for food/beverages, a good attitude

What not to bring: inhibitions, underwear

Hey - the beer pong tourney was lots of fun last year.Will there be another?: Is the pope Catholic?

Will Mike get in the ocean?: Yes. Naked?: no Can you?: definitely

Is this weekend really going to involve as much alcohol as you suggest?: no - much, much more

Just shoot me an email sometime before thursday to let me know if you're coming. I can provide directions if you need them. Pass this along to those I forgot.

Remember, we're only young once, but we can act stupid forever.

- Mike

...by the way, I am now accepting applications for a beer pong partner. Serious (and female) applicants only please.

***************************

I can't wait. This week is dragging. Me and Roomie#1 and K are all going down on Thurs. I think it'll only be the 3 of us (or 4 if you count the ghost)

Fun fun,

Mike