2001-08-23 2:00 p.m. I'm confused. Shut up, funnyman, I know that's nothing new. I'm confused because I saw something at lunch today that I just can't figure out. I hit up the Wendy's drive through (Mmmm... classic double with cheese) and drove over to this little secluded park around the corner from Ye Ol' Corporate Hellholle. So I'm sitting there with the windows down reading my paper and clogging my arteries. There are other businessy-type people there doing much the same. A guy drives up in his car. He's very respectable looking. Mid thirties maybe. His car is very respectable looking. A high end model that just may rhyme with Dolkswagen Dassat. This guy pulls up a few spaces down from me and just sits there for five minutes or so. Then, the dude gets out of his car and starts walking over to the swingsets. So now I'm thinking he's a 35 year old man that's gonna get his lunchtime jollies on the swings or the teeter-totter. Not that there's anything wrong with that. But he passes the swings. He passes the afore-mentioned totter. And walks right for the woods. (At this point I must mention that a *good* storyteller would've told you that the park is bordered on two sides by thick woods. Aaannnyway...) He walks along the treeline for fifty feet or so until he comes across the faintest hint of a trail. And then he just walks back into the woods. And this is why I'm confused. There's nothing back there. No houses, no roads. There's just a lot of trees and then some railroad tracks and then (2 or 3 miles later) I-95. What is this swingset-avoiding mofo doing back there? There were no other empty cars in the lot, so he wasn't meeting anyone. And I stayed for about 30 minutes more and no one came to meet him back there. What. Was. He. Doing? Maybe he had a stash of drugs back there. Maybe he was smoking weed in the woods on his lunch break. Maybe he's got some kind of sex den back there. Or maybe he's just taking a nature walk. In his work clothes. On a humid and rainy day. downtown----uptown leave me a note, fool!

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